Empathy vs. Compassion

“Wisdom without compassion is ruthlessness and compassion without wisdom is folly.” Fred Kofman “Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a harder battle.” Plato “By practicing compassion, we can become more resilient and improve our overall well-being. Bloom says, ‘careful reasoning mixed with a more distant compassion […] makes the world a better place.’” “The problem with empathy is the flip side that psychologists refer to as emotional empathy. That’s our yearning to not only understand other people but to feel their pain, too.” https://www.betterup.com/blog/compassion-vs-empathy We’ve discussed the difference between empathy and compassion on this board before, and I created a YouTube video on the topic. People who claim to be ”empaths” own a hard road, I believe. Feeling others’ pain” as a “thought” in our head rather than as a bodily sensation can help keep us from completely “sucking” up the other person’s physical problems/disease. Being empathetic is an attempt “to feel” the other person’s angst almost as much as if the originating event actually happened personally to us. Either compassion or empathy can lead to the same end we are trying to achieve - helping one another (Galatians 5:13, 1 Corinthians 10:24), but compassion is healthier because we aren’t carrying the actual emotional burden that gets our body into biochemical problems! This is worth reading. Tapping, I believe, can make us more compassionate than empathetic, keeping us healthier both physically and emotionally. And Jesus exuded compassion in His ministry by finding ways to help others without getting tied up in our human drama until the Father allowed Calvary. Sherrie Rice Smith Certified EFT Practitioner EFTforChristians.com Author of EFT for Christians 5 Book Series

Sexual Abuse and Tapping

Why don't women, in particular, seek help after sexual abuse. Here's why!

The term "rape" is the overarching global title given to any uninvited sexual event. And the exposing of it all, thanks to the Pennsylvania Grand Jury 2018 Report , is messy, soon to become messier, as the extent of the cover-up and complicity comes to light.

Underneath that broad topic is the sub-category of incest. We know in EFT that a trauma to one person is not a trauma to another & how each of us responds is indeed extremely individualistic.

But incest carries another couple of layers of pain/deeper issues.

Because most perps are known to any rape victim having a close family member take sexual advantage of a child/adolescent creates a double or triple "bust of trust", as I call it.

Rape may be a one time event, violent, unwarranted, but incest within an offending household can literally go on for 1-2 decades, event following event following event. Memories building chemically, binding the victim in a web of hardened core beliefs, as stated in this article. Often PTSD follows because of the complex developmental trauma.

There is so much bio-chemically bound up into the mechanism as to the whys and hows a victim gets tied to his/her perp. It hardwires itself into another disconnected (dissociated) story of its own whereby the truth becomes so blurred that extracting the facts decades later in nigh unto impossible.

As we become a better trauma informed society, this will change. But we are nowhere even close yet. I still have EFT acquaintances who cannot discuss this subject, let alone tap with a client on the topic.

For all of you reading this, please just remember - be compassionate, listen if called upon to do so, no judgments please, and tap for yourself as you hear any sexual trauma (or any trauma) stories told to you. The tapping will calm you so you can stay with the story, listening quietly. It may be the first time a "victim" has told anyone what has happened to him/her!

EFT is not a substitute for sound medical advice, so contact your own personal doctor when help is needed.

Sherrie Rice Smith

Certified EFT Practitioner

EFTforChristians.com

Author of EFT for Christians 5 Book Series