Monday, June 29, 2015

PTSD Article


The 6 hour window here is probably why when doing Matrix Reimprinting (MR) we instruct the client to "imprint" the new memory at least once more in the subsequent 5 hours after the session. Two, three or four times would be even better to change those neurons into that new picture.
Memory reconsolidation happens everytime we repeat a trauma story. The story simply changes with each re-telling. We mix stories together. We mess up the details. None of this matters in EFT and MR. Perception is ALL that counts - what did the memory, true or false, mean to the client? That is what we eventually change with tapping - perception.
This is why I instruct parents to tap with kids before bed. Come up with a bedtime routine, be it prayers or reading, that includes a few minutes of tapping.
Allow each child to briefly speak about their day while their siblings tap with them. Everyone gets "borrowed benefits" from the others, and anything that might have bothered the child gets "consolidated" with negative emotional perceptions removed before the hippocampus has time to embed them in the body.......so we practitioners can 20-30 years later make alot of money removing those negative memories!!!
http://www.nicabm.com/nicabmblog/trauma-can-traumatic-memories-be-changed/

For more information, go to  www.EFTforChristians.com

To schedule a free EFT consultation coaching session, email me at eftforchristians@gmail.com

Always remember to take complete responsibility for your own health and well-being.

Monday, June 22, 2015

EFT & Standing in the Gap - Depression

EFT & Standing in the Gap

Ezekiel 22:20 reads, “Thus I have searched among them for someone who could build a wall or stand in the breach before me to keep me from destroying the land; but I found no one”.
God always looks for someone, a Christian, to stand in the gap for another. Who is available? Who is willing? Sadly, today, not many people are. We are too busy, too pre-occupied with our own lives in this rattle trap hectic world.
Many times, when this Scripture verse is cited, it is always used in conjunction with intercessory prayer for an unbeliever. I want to take the context a bit further. Prayer is absolutely essential, without a doubt. God wants us to ask and He is faithful to answer, but the step further I’m discussing is actually physically standing in the gap for the hurting person.
What is bringing this thought forward is I have a friend from church that is having an awful time, right now, with depression.  No one wants to hang around a depressed person. It’s nasty. They cry, whine, talk negatively, and just mostly wish they were dead, to put it about as plainly as I can, as a R.N.  How do I know this? I’ve been in this dear sister’s shoes before myself.  Not only did the emotions of depression near drown me, but it went even a step further. I wanted to be dead. I wanted out of my misery, and eliminate myself as the source of misery for everyone around me.  I hated myself. I was angry at everyone and everything. The pain was nearly unbearable.
So, what happens when a person feels this way?  Everyone avoids them!  Unless you have experienced firsthand, or known someone close to you who has been depressed, you have absolutely no idea what to do or how to help a depressed person. The last thing you want to do is spend time with them. You run in the opposite direction as quickly as you can.     
However, all this does to the depressed person is to make them feel more isolated and depressed, compounding the problem. They don’t care about themselves, and, now, it appears neither does anyone else. It is a horrible position to be in.
I would like to suggest a solution. A useable, concrete, viable solution to the problem - teach the depressed one to tap. Yes, use Emotional Freedom Techniques on the symptoms!  The more they cry, the deeper they are feeling the effects and emotions of their depression and sadness. Tap, and keep tapping until the crying breaks. It works.  The person will eventually stop crying, and you have begun the process of changing those negative neural connections within the physiology God created, directing them toward a healthier and optimistically balanced outlook on life.
I want to go one step further. Tapping on people with depression-like symptoms takes perseverance; it must be repeating over and over until relief is obtained. Not only does the saddened friend feel overwhelmed, but they also feel very much alone. I would suggest asking them if company is something that strengthens them, giving them hope that someone actually cares.  If so, then offer to come visiting every other day and tap with them, keeping their spirits up and the neural connections moving in the positive directions. Often, EFT appointments are made every week or every other week, allowing the neurons to revert back to those deeply set negative positions. Try tapping frequently, encouraging your sad friend to do so for themselves if they are able. Offer, if you have time and the inclination, to simply sit with them quietly.
If the friend is having a particularly bad day when all it seems they are able to do is cry, try tapping on them. Just sit quietly and tap for them on whatever meridian points you can comfortably reach, without getting yourself into too many body fluids.  If you can only use the top of the head point, side of the eye, and the K-27 collarbone spot, it is good enough. Just keep tapping until the crying ceases. It will. I promise. You have just helped move a mountain of emotional garbage without ever really knowing what was involved in it. You don’t need to know the exact issue(s). All that is important for EFT to work is for the person to feel what s(he) is feeling. If they are crying, they are feeling the pain! The body and subconscious knows exactly what is going on and exactly what the person is experiencing, meaning it knows what it needs to clear and which emotions to move out. The Holy Spirit does all the thinking work; you just tap.
And while you tap, pray for your friend. Pray for healing and wholeness. Quietly pray or pray out loud- whatever you feel comfortable in doing.  “Confess your sins to each other and pray for one another so that you may be healed” James 5:16.
You have just stood in the gap for a friend!  Physically stood in the gap, as you have no idea what your friend is really thinking or feeling about life and death, unless they have chosen to share that with you. All those sadness based emotions must be moved along into the dustbin of history, if your friend is to heal.
Stand in the gap for them. Tap for them. Pray for them. Sit with them, even if it is in silence. Be a presence for them, as Jesus is for us. We are told to do what we can in the natural world, allowing God to take care of the supernatural one. Believe for a healing for your friend until they can believe it can happen for them. “Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it and it will be ours” Mark 11:24.  For those of us who know EFT, God equips us and commissions us to move forward and heal others. St. Augustine said it best, “Without God, we cannot. Without us, God will not."

Jesus stood in the gap of sin for us when He went to the Cross on Calvary to give us new life and set our feet on the pathway to heaven. It’s the least you can do for a fellow Christian, or anyone else, for that matter!
For more information, go to  www.eftforchristians.com
To schedule a free EFT coaching session, email me at eftforchristians@gmail.com

Always remember to take complete responsibility for your own health and well-being.

Monday, June 15, 2015

What Trauma Does to Us


 Here is a blog article from someone who has had sexual abuse:  This is reprinted with permission. 

If you are similarly suffering, it is time for God to heal you!  Please contact me. See the contact information at the bottom of this blog article.

"Missing June
For those of you abused, what has your abuser(s) taken from you recently? For me, it was my June.
I wait all year for June. It is the equivalent of a kid waiting for Christmas. There are so few precious Junes in our lifetime. Each needs to be properly celebrated and experienced with the June-only traditions like strawberry picking, garden hose frolicking, first-time outdoor swimming, planting of the state-fair zinnias and wayyyyy… too many trips to the ice cream stand. Ah, and kids’ softball. Warm nights watching the games with the evenings played under the lights being a special treat.

Junes come too fast and furious following the craziness of May. May is filled with new spring events, awards ceremonies and end-of-school-year chaos. Then suddenly, one morning we wake-up and June is here in all it’s warm-but-not-too-hot and sometimes-thunderstorms-but-not-gray-skies-glory.

I am always the happiest in June. Last year at the end of this month, I made my husband and our daughters sit in a circle on the living room floor for a special good-bye to June ceremony. We held hands and I sang “Amazing June how sweet the sound, that saved a SAD (seasonal affective disorder) like me. I was once blue but now I’m not, because of vitamin D.” We then went around the circle and shared our favorite thing about June. The rest of the participants weren’t nearly as excited as I, but no matter. I had a glorious moment sitting with my loves reminiscing about the baby animals we had rescued in the past 4 weeks.

This year I started talking about June early. Maybe all the way back in March when we were on our 6th month of dark sky misery. I speculated what June day the bunnies would greet us by the neighbor’s evergreens and debated over if we would try to grow another vegetable garden. And I could not wait to have my three girls all to myself, all day every day.

But this June sucked. Today is already June 13 and the past two weeks are a sucky suckish suck filled fog. I vaguely remember standing at a podium in an elementary school cafeteria asking our school board president to resign after learning of character letters he and a local priest had written for a convicted pedophile. The priest went as far as stating he didn’t feel this dangerous predator deserved any jail time! This injustice triggered the dreaded storm to brew in my every pore. I had certain knowledge a door I rarely even peek through, and then, only when I absolutely have to, was about to fly off its’ hinges and pin me under. But I knew someone had to remind these men who so callously protected a man who enjoyed child rape that there just happens to be tiny victims that you are forgetting.


And fly open that door did. First the anger overtook me. Anger for these nameless and faceless kids used and thrown away that this priest and school board president just seemed to be forgetting as they stood tall with a dangerous pedophile. And then the anger of the past came roaring-in which morphed into two weeks lost to PTSD so debilitating I slept only a few fitful hours a night and jumped so violently at every little startle I had bruises from banging into things. My abusers’ huge adult faces loomed over my smaller child’s and I could see the wrongness in their eyes and feel the scratchiness of faces. I would wake up choking and try a cool shower to calm me but then the sound of the shower would take me back to a bathroom I hid in as a 13-year-old, naked and vulnerable. And it all just kept coming and coming. It was relentless. The sounds and smells. The voices. The hands. And all I wanted was to reach-out and comfort the other girls that I knew these monsters also had tried to ruin. The ones that like me, had no voices.

This third week has been sheer exhaustion just trying to cope. Coping meaning getting out of bed. And off the floor. For the first time this summer, I walked through my yard and performed one of my all-time favorite June activities- cutting flowers. Bob did a particularity good job on the gardens this year and I was just now observing the roses, daylilies, red-hot poker and dozen other beauties. Inside, as I looked at my collection in a vase, a sudden grief over swept me so fierce it took my breath away. Bob could only hold me and repeat “I’m sorry” as I bawled over and over “I lost my June. I have no June. Because someone took something from me merely because he wanted it, I have lost my June.”

And this is how it goes when surviving sex abuse. Things were stolen from you and no matter how many times you feel that you have made peace with this knowledge, there comes those times you just want them back. There are always the befores and only-ifs. People who love you will prompt you to go through your gratitude list and heal and stay in the present and yes, eventually you do. But damn, when it comes up it is brutal. And different everytime. This time was more anger. Last time it was darkness and depression after one of my abusers, a priest, was removed from a church due to a young girl’s allegations of abuse. I remember thinking My God Yes! Finally Justice!  Finally people will see him for the monster he really is and not his clever facade of the holiest of all men. But in a matter of months he was back out among a new flock of voiceless children.


And here in my hometown, this is what is happening all over again. A pedophile is removed and another man steps-in to defend him. And neither this man the priest, nor the other man the school board president, penned a letter of defense for the kids. The kids that very well today may be dead. And the predator that greatly contributed to their demise gets released from prison in half the time because these men decided it was a swell idea to present the court with letters containing all the selfless things he has done like contributing large sums of money to the church.

Today, and probably forever, the survivor guilt in me agonizes over the amount of victims my abusers had in their lifetimes: those who came before me and those who went after.. I want nothing more at this moment than to tell them that I am paying attention. And I will not forget them.
And I wonder what these men took from them today…"

For more information go to www. EFTforChristians.com .  To schedule a free 15 minute EFT consultation to see if EFT is right for you, email me at EFTforChristians@gmail.com.

Always remember to take complete responsibility for your own health and well-being.

Wednesday, June 10, 2015

Forgiveness & EFT


The more I read the more I get what is going on underneath all of this EFT stuff.

Forgiveness is the bottom line. It's what Jesus preached about alot, but when is the last time you heard a pastor tell you how to forgive?

Yep! Never! All we ever heard is forgive and forget.

Well, it doesn't work that easy. I'm tired of listening to it.

Forgetting and denial and stuffing it has never gotten a Christian one inch closer to forgiveness. We Christians are the best preachers of "get over it" I've ever seen. And mostly because we don't want to listen to someone else's pain. Why? Because it, too, triggers us. We feel it and it reminds us of our own pain.

The hurt is too deep and too intense. It's glued into our physiology the way God created it to be. Once Adam and Eve sinned, the shame of it got stuck in us for succeeding generations. It's called original sin.

Until each of us is willing to go back into the pain and look at it again, feeling it, and allowing Jesus to release it, not us release it, nothin' ever going to happen.

Tapping is the way God created in us to release it. Once we release enough of our garbage, the forgiveness just plain comes naturally. We eventually feel no angst against whomever hurt us.

They may never, ever, ever change their behavior, but that is NOT our job to change them!  That is the HS's job. Our job is to, with the help of the HS, change ourselves. Cooperate in God's method of sanctification. EFT is one method.

For more information go to www. EFTforChristians.com .  To schedule a free 15 minute EFT consultation to see if EFT is right for you, email me at EFTforChristians@gmail.com.

Always remember to take complete responsibility for your own health and well-being.